Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Round-Up

I hope to hereby start and maintain a chronicle, if you will, of political and cultural events that might otherwise go unnoticed by history. Sunday evenings will therefore find me behind this sadistic keyboard halfway through my second glass of Chianti, racking what's left of my brain to bring you my take on the latest endeavors of God and man.

The Tsunami, that wasn't...One couldn't help notice the disappointment in the breathless live coverage of the near-disaster Americans of Hawaiian and non-Hawaiian descent alike faced as the made-for-cable TV event came and went, peacefully. I kept thinking of the coverage of the O. J. Simpson "car-chase." But TV producers were a bit slow, I think, to pick up on the fact that escaping thousands of casualties and property damage in the billions was a good thing. Better luck next time?

Dude, where's OUR half of Hawaii? is what some Americans may have been asking if the Tsunami had, in fact, hit the island chain. A bill pending before the U.S. Senate would codify yet another grievance sub-group of Americans, Hawaiians. If you are among those in the eastern 49 still digging out of tsunami-like snow storms, it may come as news that your Democratic Senator(s) are about to consider a bill to let half the Hawaiian population out of state and federal taxes and reduce by 48 percent the available property for your next vacation in paradise. For me, the really funny thing is how we will further subdivide the "Native Americans" among us. Is it fair to lump all the American Indian tribes together (as well as the sub-arctic nations) as Native Americans while the Hawaiians, who feast on pineapple while the ladies walk around in coconuts and grass skirts, all year long, get the further distinction of Special Native Americans? Don't worry, though, the Republicans will save you from this Constitutional travesty, and you'll still get to tut-tut and shake your head ruefully at dinner parties in Georgetown and Berkeley over the grave injustice done the Native Hawaiian Americans by the evil white man.

This is a Blue Dog? Incumbent Democratic Congressmen must break into a cold sweat when they hear "It's a reporter from the Annapolis Kapital." Are they afraid the Kapital reporter will bluntly report the facts to hundreds of voters in Congressional District 1? No. What Frank Kratovil fears is that he'll let slip a giggle or a snort at the wrong time. When Kapital reporters are not conducting interviews or writing or running copy to the paste-up department, do they read? Do they confine their reading to back issues of the Kapital? MD-1 voters, I guess, are alone in their ambivalence over federal spending and the legacy of debt we are creating for our children. Spending, according to Kratovil is not an issue for his constituents. Instead, he whispers after that obligatory furtive glance around, it's the economy! If that doesn't say independent, then maybe this will: Kratovil voted against the Pelosi-crats a whopping 12 percent of the time! That's right, he jeopardized is political career by voting NO on raising the debt ceiling. Apostasy! Then he shrewdly cashed his Cap-and-Trade vote for an ObamaCare NO free card from Pelosi, with the understanding that he will vote for the next Stimulus plan and whatever comes out of the Senate's Bride of ObamaCare II. Yes, Kratovil is nobody's fool.

And from the Mail-Bag: The gender-benders of Montgomery County and their fellow travellers in the General Assembly are it again, trying to pass a law that makes civilized behavior a crime. Ruth Jacobs and the Maryland Citizens for Responsive Government says "The Gender Identity/Bathroom Bill is Back as HB-1022 and SB-583 and is essentially unchanged from last year. We need your calls and e-mails TO MARYLAND LEGISLATORS as soon as possible." Now, can we count on the MD Republican caucus in the senate to debate and vote against a bill that makes it a crime to stop or harass a man who suddenly feels pretty or is not sure, today, whether he is a man or a woman, from entering public accommodations reserved for ladies? Well, there's always Hope. Call and write them this week! Copy me and I'll post the best e-mails!

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